Coexistence

Colors of hope penetrated deep into my grayscale dream

I rose from my slumber and was greeted by this striking scene

Fantasy and reality had collided

And at some point during this time, I realized

That the mastery of coexistence between light and shadow

Is born from life’s highest highs and lowest lows

I’m a believer of balance. Equal force, equal opposite reaction. I practiced so much gratitude and positivism over the past few years, that my growth eventually stagnated because I neglected my shadow side this entire time. I became heavily unbalanced.

There were major events this year that forced my shadow side to emerge. 2019 was my most blissful and painful year yet. However, through the confrontation and exploration of my shadow side, the picture that I’ve painted of myself is now more detailed than ever. There’s a feeling of some inner peace with the acknowledgement that the light and darkness in me are learning to coexist with one another.

I’m grateful for all of the experiences that led me to this point, and for being able to finally face my shadow side. I’m learning to embrace this part of me, and shall proudly carry my new sense of self into this next defining decade. Thank you and cheers!

Baby, it doesn’t matter how much you’re

overcast by shadows or how

choppy your waves are

I can still see the light you shed in the

depths of you

First post of 2019. Five-minute poetry that flowed through my brain while overlooking the ocean on the pier. This goes out to all the souls I’ve touched. Thank you for inviting me in.

Unavailable.

Just like that, she retreats to her home realm
her figure in the ocean,
her spirit by the stars,
her remnants with the winds

I have expended much of myself without actively replenishing. My inner being is chaotically housing a frantic shell and crinkled soul. As much as I like to be with people, a time of solitude is necessary for me to develop some introspection and to fill myself back with self-love. So for now, I am unavailable.

It’s tough to remain positive and grateful in dark times, but thanks to the nature of this blog, I am forced to reflect on the good as well. Thanks for keeping me afloat, dear blog. Also, thanks, random photo grid of people in my camera roll, for helping me see my end goals and motivating me to push forward. Cheers to future simple words of gratitude.

Love,
Connie

Disparity.

Myself & Them

“Listen to us.
We know what is best for you.”
My soul sobs as my shell becomes
spellbound by the songs of Them.
Ugh… Forget about being heard,
I only want equilibrium for myself.

I was recently introduced to the dynamic and mesmerizing world of fine art, thanks to a new friend who is quite active within the Los Angeles art community. While supporting him at his solo art show at the Pacific Design Center in West Hollywood, I stumbled upon the art exhibit of Yu JinYoung, who’s sculptures represent the social disparities we are often exposed to throughout our lives. This series is called “Myself & Them.” The heavy feeling of responding to the outside world while taking care of our own inner world really resonated within me, as I questioned my life choices and potential trajectories, as well as my own influence throughout my social circle. Oh, the struggles of dealing with the words of others while treasuring the dreams of my inner being, and balancing life. Being human sure isn’t easy, but it’s a gift we must cherish and nurture to the best of our abilities.

Thanks,  Yu JinYoung, for welcoming me into your exhibition and allowing me to bond with your amazing pieces. Through my experience with your art, I am learning how to love myself in this world full of social disparities that continue to challenge my personal values. Also, a thank you to my new friend, for introducing me to his fascinating world. Cheers.

Water & Earth

Let me feed your soil
with the finest water
nourish your seeds, watch you
sprout past the sky’s limits
into the infinite
where our hearts may connect.

Prompted by some feelings that struck me hard one day, many different thoughts from different places in my life ultimately came together and collaborated to create the piece above. I can relate this to every aspect of my life [work, personal, etc.], and it [hopefully, subtly] expresses what I truly wish for.

Today, I thank Mother Nature, for the rain we’ve been receiving these past couple of days, for the oddly soothing sound of thunder, for the beautiful sunshine that momentarily emerged from behind the gray clouds, and for the rare sight of the sky colored in lovely pastel hues during sunset. Thank you, Mother Nature, for being a creative influence for this poem. Thank you for connecting the following thought: Water nurtures Earth, and Earth grounds water. Things aren’t always smooth as there are times of turmoil between Water and Earth (floods, hurricanes, etc.). But for the most part, they help each other, potentially forming a strong and complementary pair.

[Sending good vibes and love to everyone!]

How Do You “Unlove” Someone?

You don’t.

Don’t resist. Don’t force.
Simply wish them love and peace
Even from afar.

The way I’m interpreting this question is: How do I stop loving someone because they are no longer in my life and I need to move on? The piece above is my response.

I believe love takes on many different facets of emotions and actions, and its shape is individually unique in every relationship. Love is fluid, its dynamics can shift, and it isn’t mutually exclusive with anything. We can continue to love those from our past without hurting ourselves by wishing them love, backed by the acknowledgement that we are better off and happier without them. Therefore, I don’t believe in “unloving” someone.

Thanks, dear friend, for asking me this interesting question and for reminding me how far I’ve come. I hope my answer is helpful and brings in some new perspective to you. It is possible to move on while loving people of our past. With that said, you’ll get out of the rut you’re stuck in. You’ll be fine.

Coexistence

image
Drowning
In the dead winter
he overdosed on
smog
polluted his soul
destroyed.
He chooses darkness
sees tainted ugliness.
Yet, at the core, he has a brilliant soul.
It itches to shine, too petrified to
find freedom.

Healing
In the fresh spring
she was vitalized by the
sun
unclipped her wings
soared.
She chooses light
sees pure beauty.
She forbids the darkness within
from consuming her, peacefully
breathes positivity.

They pity each other.

To a dark one: Thank you for bringing me to reality a bit, and pointing out my ugly side. Through you, I was reminded that we all have light and darkness coexisting within ourselves. I’ve been so caught up in trying to be positive and a saint, that I didn’t see how my actions could have been more harmful than helpful. You have shown me how different human perspectives can be.

Thanks for inspiring me. I have learned from you, and I hope that you have learned a thing or two from me as well.

I see beauty in you. I feel sad for you. I care for you. Most importantly, though, I believe in you. Good luck, boo.